Maggie’s Rich!

So, I have hesitated posting this because… well the last time I posted (in FEBRUARY) I was recounting a story about Maggie when she was not on her best behaviour and the following is a new Maggie tale. She’s really, truly, not a bad girl. She’s comical and precocious and sometimes sneaky, but not bad. Ultimately, the story is a good one. When I look back at this online journal when the kids are grown, this is a story I will want to remember.

Homer came home late one night with nine $100 bills (a friend had repaid a loan in cash). He put it on my nightstand under a notebook so I would remember to take it to the bank.

The next morning, Maggie saw the pile and said, “Is that a hundred dollars?”

“Yes, it is. Please don’t touch it,” I said.

We went downstairs and continued with our morning. Homer was driving the kids to school and I left for work.

At the schoolyard, the three kids scattered to meet up with their friends, leaving Homer standing with a group of moms, still carrying Maggie’s backpack. He decided there was no reason to wait around for the bell, since the kids were all happy and playing, so he went to give Maggie her backpack.

Maggie took the backpack, gave Homer a big hug and said, “I love you, Daddy!”

As he walked away, he heard an excited small person exclaim, “Maggie’s rich!”

He took another couple of steps and then thought to turn around to see what the kid was talking about. The kid was holding a crisp $100 bill. So was the kid beside that kid.

Homer recovered the $200 immediately, then frantically patted down Maggie, ripped apart her backpack and questioned each member of her posse. Bart’s teacher approached him to ask if everything was okay. He told her that Maggie may have distributed another seven $100 bills to her little friends. He offered no explanation as to why we would have cash in such large bills just lying around the house (potential teacher thoughts: drug dealers, housewife hooker, money launderers…). The teacher promised to pass along the message to Maggie’s teacher, politely stifling a laugh.

As it turns out, Maggie had taken ‘only’ two of the bills from the pile. When asked why she did it, she said she wanted to prove to her friends that we were ‘million-billionaires’.

She was adequately punished. She’s really not a bad girl.