Monday, December 10, 2007

It's the thought that counts.

About 5 years ago, I unwrapped a Christmas present that made me laugh like no other. I present for you, the VAC 550:

My dear husband thought this was the perfect gift for me. Something that will make our cheese last for weeks (even though we go through a giant brick of cheese in 1 week). Something we can use for all of our freezer goods (we only have the little freezer on top of the fridge and that only hosts ice cubes, ice cream, Popsicles and a few frozen vegetables). Something to keep our cookies fresh (because he also sprung for these accessories):

Never mind that you have to suck the air out EACH TIME you go in for a cookie.

Needless to say, it sat on the counter for about a year and was more of a novelty than anything. It was a great thing to bring up in front of other people when discussing lame gifts. Despite the fun of the VAC 550, it was sent to the garage long ago in favour of more counter space.

Fast forward to the weekend when I had a brilliant idea. For Lisa’s birthday party this weekend, I’m making the kids Christmas cookie decorating kits in lieu of loot bags. I bought 16 Christmas tins at the dollar store. I’m going to make the gingerbread men (and trees and snowmen) and include in the tin some icing and candies for the decorations). I needed something to package the icing so they could snip off the corner and direct the flow of icing.

What could I use? You guessed it, the VAC 550! Now, do you think I could find the thing in the garage? Right again, no I could not. I’m going to have to rummage through the pit that is our garage and find this appliance that I suddenly neeeeeed, but cannot find. I love you Vac 550. Come out, come out wherever you are!

How about you? What is the lamest gift you ever received?


JMC said...

I can't really think of a lame gift I received, but when I was a kid, my mother received a purse that had a rooster decoration on it made out of colored popcorn kernels.

LoriD said...

OMG - for the longest time, we had the rooster and hen made from popcorn kernels in our kitchen (my parents' kitchen, not mine)! It must have been a '70's thing!

Jess said...

Hm, my grandmother gave me a tiny nightgown from the children's department with a cartoon character on it for Christmas one year. When I was sixteen.

Family Adventure said...

I have a Vac, too. I'm not sure if it's a 550 or what...since it's in the garage and I haven't seen it for eons :)


mom of the year said...

Dear God, my husband can be a really HORRIBLE gifter. Our first Christmas together, he bought me a shower rack for all of my shower stuff because he didn't like my bottle farm. And I was all, "Where the hell is my jewelry?" in my head. I appreciate practicality, but COME ON! For Mother's Day (my first one mind you), he gave me Oreo cookies and bubble bath. Excuse me? I just spend 18 hours in labor 2 months prior and this is IT?!

Beck said...

My mother in law likes to give me hair stuff. She gave me a crimping iron several years in a row.
She's also given me a paper shredder and a bootscraper that looks like a cat.
My husband, though, always gives me stuff I like.

Misty said...

*Hem* *hem*

Ok, ready? Our very first Christmas together, after we had been living in the same tiny apartment for over 6 months, my now husband presents me with a huge fancily wrapped box, complete with bow. I unwrap it and find another box, and in it, another box. My Honey is looking very anxious and excited about me opening this gift. So, my eyes are as big as saucers. My parents are giving me meaningful looks. You know what we were all thinking, right? Of course. There is going to be a little black box with a big old diamond, right????

I finally get down to it and there is a duct tape wrapped envelope and in the a Christmas card. Saying Merry Christmas. And that is it.

I still haven't forgiven him.

Tessie said...

I just got a gift THIS WEEKEND that I am hoping will not end up in this category. It's an electronic shopping list thingee with voice recognition. You add items and then it prints out your list all catetgorized and whatnot. I used it this weekend but I'm still on the fence. I'll have to post about it and let you guys decide if it's deal or dud.

Laural Dawn said...

That is Hilarious!
I saw one at Costco the other day and my husband loved it. But, we have a "no kitchen appliance for a gift".
Dumbest gift ever - I asked for a cat for Christmas and my husband got me a hat and scarf.
It was our first Christmas. I spent it trying not to cry.
I now send him wish lists.

Pickles & Dimes said...

That is hilarious about the Vac!

When I was in college, I asked my parents for a beanbag chair, in either white or black. After we opened presents, my mom went downstairs and brought up this huge garbage bag. I opened it, expecting a plain white or black beanbag, and found a multi-colored, NEON beanbag chair.

I thought they were joking and when I asked them where the real one was, my mom got really mad.

I used the hallucinogenic one (covered with a white blanket) for a few years until Abby peed on it. She did me a favor.

Saly said...

Ok, I pined for the Tilia Foodsaver forever and actually got one about 6 years ago. I've used it maybe 10 times. So not worth it.

Worst gift worst gift. i don't know. My mom gave me this lame ass ceramic fondue pot last year. Like I have time to sit arond and gingerly dip fondue.

bananafana said...

finally I have time to comment!
I actually really wanted a Vac thingee. I don't know what I thought I was going to do with it though.
lamest gift I ever got was from my grandparents - after years of crazy gift exchanges they decided that there were too many grandkids so we all got a shrink-wrapped rice krispy treat. Nothing says happy holidays and thanks for driving 10 hours to see us like a bear-shaped cereal bar

Kristen said...

How typical that you can't find the darn thing now that you need it;)
I have to say my dh is often a lame gift giver. Two years ago I got and iPod video that I have never gotten to use. It immediately took up permanent residence in his work truck. Well right after I uploaded 7500 songs on it from our cd collection. Bugger!